meeeesh

written in '09

Expose a life.
In snow, it's white.
But in her I find: I never knew this,
and occasionally, aging with thee, I mind this.
Though beautiful bliss is a kiss I break wrists,
and it show's and we're certain it blows. I might miss.
Eventually eyes will find mist.

Mine insist that they froze when a certain death rose,
and all the prose that they wrote were only curtains of hope.
Until the seems fell, it seems our scene has seen hell.
Means well, but I felt all this flirtin' amiss.
I've seen sails overtaken by hail...'The lifeless.'
My guess? That's exactly what life is...
Inner shapes that we drape over all of our conflicts.
Mine persists untill the fools who rule desist.

The lips --
The rule of one disposing every one of our gifts.
Like an eclipse, that we found with a face down in dirt:
a true dessert, following every thrill of the proud earth.
It never hurt like this. I guess my heart's proposing,
Exposing. Every angle shown had froze me.
An angel slowly blowing in my ear.
She found me here, and I think it's only fair --

-- to float.

Let's hope they follow suit.
Paying attention to our binding roots.
Then follow. Take it from my hand and swallow.
"Tomorrow's always gonna be tomorrow."

Find time to actually go and find the appled eye.

VACUUM

Like the setting sun, he tries to wait. He falls for fake, but see's it break. It's bleak, it's cut, it knows not what - to do; a rather senseless clue.

Like Elmer glue, holding liberty spikes, he held tight onto divinity's flight...just to see if divinity bites. He sings songs of what her vanity likes.

Like,

"Come and walk with me one day, you'll see, and then we'll talk, touch hands, and be - together. They'll swear it's harmony and me, forever...breeding jealousy that acts like weather."

He hated the word 'never', but it became an escape. She hated the word 'ever', and left it in the lake.

she=breathe

she breathes....
and everytime i turn the page, she reads.
a perfect dance: inhale/exhale.
it's like it's medicine for me.

her voice is soft and like a memory that
you'd feel rather than see.
the sun's one and only broken beam;
it's like it's home to me.

a cozy sea of warmth and light.
another bed? another night?
no other head would heal this plight
(the bettering of a heathen's flight).

it's funny, her fingers finding home upon my waist. i reflect.
then, drawing hearts on my face, before her lips find sleep on my neck.

i know it's really air, but i swear i breathe her in.
it's not only that she's fair and thin, but that she's oxygen.

learning to learn (at dusk)

she was already spinning 'round before i noticed.
she looked gorgeous, like a lovely wood nymph from the forest.
her force was enough to set me back a step. i lost my breath.
i wondered how wandering on would ever bring me depth.
for the sun, it sets, it's cries are nothing but the burning of it's eyes,
and like our governing star, i keep the important things inside.
they gravitate around my mind like mines waiting to get hit.
they've all gone off, still i........you don't know the half of it.

still i sit and cultivate a way to nurture plans of touching hands.
been told to wait for mature hands who'd rather learn than demonstrate.

i know it's fate. i know it's the energy wrapped up inside of a blanket.
i'll always thank it. the stars aligned and granted patience.
i know the earth will smile every time i don't pollute it's floor's and roof.
i'm told it's truth, like i've been told to wait for you.

so, i watch you spin around the room.
the way you move, like the shifting energy of the moon.

a lesson to learn. a blessing of what i've been testing.
she was there, but i'm messy. this lesson will test me.
she spun until the moon was gone, and never once did look.
she wouldn't look......i stood there, shook.

the tides have come, and fogs roll deep.
she went with them, i fell asleep.

in faerie lands (eye grow weary)

found my feet, they loosely dragged my chin around
up off the ground. i felt the vague intention weigh me down.
i knew prevention, but didn't bring that part inside.
it smells like pride....but i'm too struck to see that side.

it's only death it's only life
i swore each color looked alright
ignore the reaching hands of light
they'll only drag us out of night

only open eyes to eyelids that still know how chivalry tastes.
a frivolous case by case enticement stood in place.

i met a creature at the bottom of the ocean that same night,
..
nothing happened, but now i see the connection and the plight.

so, i wandered off to faerie lands to find a ring for you.
i wondered if their gemstones grew just like their flowers do.
but eyes doth stray, ours will play beneath the gathered stars.
more than skin. pray we're more than body parts.

find the sum of body's hearts
before somebody else starts

her feathers falter

written in '07

infracted interactions; it was in her actions.
displaced with the rations that never met the mouths
minus subtraction, 'cause it's only rhyming with doubt
which is what i've gone without, there's no surplus inside
(it's the way that we hide all our strengths till we die)

or until the rebirth's no longer in sight.

why struggle in sand, if you're not meant for the land?
in a gruesome faerie tale, i read, you fell to the plants.
the uninhabited lands saw the new skin inside you.
in, resides truth. let it's focus design you.
the now defined proof, fell from the forest,
in chorus. we stood there, and let it absorb us.
indeed, it restored us, and let both our feet drop.
sometimes life and time might seem stopped,
when you're being sought, or are seeking after.
her meekness, her laughter..
tell me, what more matters?

the skin, sipped soft, might leave the soul smiling.
thoughts defiling, wondering why it's such a dire thing.

i'm fumbling through interactions, to see infracted reactions.
displaced with the mouths that no longer share their rations.

is it rational, or even right to say...
a faerie's feathers fault her only when her heart's away.

True Love, a true tale(honest!)

written at the end of '03. i'm very aware that this is of epic tragedy, and is almost humorously, emotionally, blunt, but there are still some parts i rather enjoy. maybe it will make you smile/cry. 

p.s. i don't know this sort of loneliness any more, and don't match up to this as much at all. I wanted to share it before it was completely irrelevant though.

so, she rolled over....facing me like that's how the game was played.
i scoffed, fearless of her reaction,
furthermore putting all effort into conveying my obvious dissatisfaction.

her fingers left the palm of my hand,
and were raised to my lips, as if to hush.
she whispered, "no shame",
but the adrenaline rush had already passed.

i had already turned my back, as she pulled at the comforter...
...wanting me to comfort her.

i was still wearing my socks, a sure sign, i had thought,
that this didn't mean what she was pretending it meant.
flashing back 10 minutes in the past, i saw my hand around her throat,
clearly strangling the demon.
i brought my lips to hers to share a vain kiss,
suffocating my desire.

she intended it to be more than just clothes on the floor,
but on nights like these,
the only thing shared is a bottle of vodka.
well, that and the drunken promises we mumble sloppily between heavy breaths,
when breathings' reached it's most difficult tier.
that mixed with the drool and the animalistic panting,
tipping the scale of our love lost finding.

we're "Once Upon a Timing," i should have shot that star down.
instead, i'm under covers,
attempting to smother my overhauled sex drive.
crying 'cause i feel desire's breeze....a second wind.

i'm coming, a long time coming, i finally came,
and i hallowed out her eyes to make windows for her brain.

just to see what's falling out of place...
to see me slip away from God's good grace.
(veterans get praised for whatever work they've done.
with that being said, i can't be expected to feel ill, at all.)

a finger through my hair made the hairs on my back rise...
the angst my heart was feeling lied directly between our eyes.
i let my gaze drift, it comes and goes with the wind, and,
without thinking, i chuckled in her face.

she must have thought that two people meeting in a bar,
and falling in love, was close to impossible,
and that my laughter was sprung from the irony of it all,
cause she smiled rather sweetly.

i hadn't the heart to break it to her....
so, i laid still.......broken

another lonely night to prolong an even lonlier future.
i licked her neck, licked the wound i had left,
and left her there to drown in the empty ocean she swore was our love.

eye

beauty lives in the eye. i try to live in beauty. i live to steal a glance

fabled foreplay

With a flick of the wrist, envisioning twists.
It's the essence i miss, not the visiting nymphs,
who inflict their indecisions with provocative lips.
Indescribable intentions almost instantly miss
(while a kiss could be prescribed and be pretentiously true).
In it's festering place, but wanting to be infested by you.
The arrest of the moon professed the rest of the move.
Stars confessed they were roofs, ..as if i hadn't found proof..

pleiades

written in '07

Their friends call him the angry martyr,
while they label her the queen of smirk.
And she would uphold her name indefinitely,
saying, 'Blame my heredity.'

I can't complain, though, no matter how small the window
that shows life to me. Its nice to see.

And so it fits that her eyelids would close, and leave me panicked.
I'm not allowed to call it manic. A leak see's panic.
I'd rid myself of grief, like a falling, candid leaf.
Sad ships sink, leaving lovers lost in reefs;

leaving lover's open arms intangible when unleashed.

It's sad, cause tangibility mattered not, once upon a time.
Once, her lovelessness was mine, and she'd smirk while i would shine.
And the stars would come form lines, to witness this still while she's kissing me.
Her visits will be missed by me. The sky aligned to tell our history.

Every now and then the clouds will part and you can see,
her with me. Binary; sharing an identity.

Heredity won't matter once time can't tell,
They'll only see constellations that speak of love that fell.

know time to mend

mars held high, his mighty fist

wide struck, the eyes in the lake's muck

there's no star, no sky, no great white black nothing

i might..

though, finite.

though instruments are used to keep tongues and thumbs busy,

the love from someone is ..

i flush through the rays and the colours say, "who is he?"

they flash forward full faced with intention. no mention, or better yet, nothing.

dizzy, cause the pull's pace insists the more winded of two roads

new lows, old highs

hand stuck to her cold thighs,

a cute kiss between both eyes,

that soak lies up in the midriff and her short's ties

"broken down", was spoke from the frown.

the mindlessness mattered not, but the removed gown

what is it with this town? gownlessness awaits yours at it's feast.

and the eyes disguise abruptly, hope stuck in the grease.

i'm hoping that you'll at least be there, for snow angels 1st share

their definition in hopes of readmission.

to the stone soul, that can't remember time,

and won't accept the death of things if it isn't him that dies.

i know lies, and these ones seem twisted,

mislead towards rebirth, his night's light had missed it.

and so he enlisted in life, and reemerged apart from strain,

acceptance in strife. there'll be no expectance of rights,

or the values that we confuse with bad nights. i'll reuse all the lights

that haven't yet burnt out. discerned the learned doubt, i've learned to let out.

hocus pocus family focus,

what comes before the ability to notice?

when will it show it's not there to obtain?

left it to let out my tired old brain.

no thoughts, just bare toes,

stumbling onto epiphanies the sun rose
to my attention.
i know now there isn't time enough to mention,
or, that you've not made time for my redemption.

there's no clarity with out suspension.

so suspend it, and save it for a day that you will mend it.

forgot about angels to remember the worms

her body:
an echo.

a murmur

rhyming with perfection.

could be an insect,

that i could love,

or,

an angel. i forget.

and then, i remember,

but where did she go?

Wendy-bird

Friends with the pillows. It's the way her eyes get close,

then, get closed (as though too exposed).

Glitter explodes, and flys from eyelids to toes.

Two toes that could touch, and then clutch through dirt roads.

suggested resting places

Be well
Dispel false aggressors
Fall impressed her; interest in all things lesser
Arrest the fleeting feeling that's innate, then escape
Find the fate in fake
Find the gate, and meet me there tonight
We'll take flight, and write the world off right
Loving love is light. It seems as though it's seams are tight

Sometimes the sun climbs

I see hung blinds denying the eyes of shine

It finds me finding time to go unwind the blinds that blind them

The blinds, they bind them

Forever unwise men

find SHADE

finding hope in the shape of a boy,
just to see what a look could deploy.

destroyed the union of snake and of pen.
befuddled by iron, the stake in my friend.
mistaken again, it crumbles. it's waste.
his waist sits up high, like the perfection he faced,
and so a belt he wears will neither loosen nor fall.
it won't be loosened at all. i sat there in awe.

in the shade of the hope that an old oak brings,
i sat watching him pass through sunburn and springs.
some birds would sing, with a pitch he didn't know.
frustrated, he would toss them into his throat.

there's a lesson somewhere. it might be hidden inside,
though i doubt there's more than 3 of us it would ever really find.
the shape of the folly of the malignant-made sun;
that is the outcome. what more can be done?
maybe with a free mind, free choices will be made.
OR
or the intoxications, that exist in the exchanging of breath, will float EFFORTLESSLY into the changeable minds of those inclined to be not them. to be not made....like a mind, a mental state, country, or town. we wear the crown we shape and the gown that's loosely draped,  to hide the fat that creation provided in order for us to provide. we hide. we dont sit and wait. we find shade in the hope of the shadows. where there is no hope. where we pretend we met. where you still can't remember how to get out, or to get back. we draw pretty pictures and haiku's on the walls, but, without even the slightest shimmer of light, we are unable to see or to learn from. what would we learn? that life is expected, and that living is not? would we see that the day is nothing compared to the minute? or that the minute is nothing compared to the exhalation of free minds?

i find complexity in the most simple of things. i find life in ugly.
i only know rhyme, from in the center of the nursery.

so, i sit and wait. there's no hope in the shade
that i cast, but i laugh, 'cause i made it that way.
i look back, and i gasp, 'if i had only been brave.'
i see waves, 'cause i stayed on the shore the whole day.

be out there, out side

lyrics (for my verse) for a song barrie and i did together.

she seems scared, can't imagine asking her to leave.
she pull's my sleeve....then leaves the leaves for different dreams.
she sleeps to sleep.

it's nice when she explains this vice to me.
her smile's sweet, and rightfully.
swore to her i'd lead gently (it'd feel right to me).

i know collective consciousness is swayed, but that's ok.
the moment's vague. i think that's why you stay inside to play.
(aww)
i'll carry you, if that's the only way.
it's the only time you'll hear me say,
with a hidden message, i'll convey,
"OH, it's smart, you always know to follow heart."

it might be best to fall asleep, then follow.
feel the ceiling peel away to dreams that fall, too.

i exalt you. the assault's through.
you lay before the part of me that would haunt you.

it's smart, you always follow heart.
i tell my friends you're really smart, the way you follow your heart.

the moanment

written in '02

feeding from a hand who just yesterday

purged me of doubt, convinced me of settling.

settlers seeding stays solid, but it's

the crow who finds his way.

call me wingless, say i'm not an angel

tell me i'm human. i'll only do what i do.

in doing, i opt to do what just yesterday

i found foolish. foolishly, accepting the fall.

it exists in the moment your teeth

take hold of your bottom lip..

and i,

for one,

seemingly/knowingly/wholeheartedly accept this.

acceptance derived from some outward display

some outburst of emotion...no...

...just the biting of her lip.

oh, i'd sip her skin if it was meant for such a thing.

the dire needs that i'm now a product of.

the flesh, the caramel that pours out over it...

rising breasts with each rising breath

my eyes rest when rising's left

no chain...no leash...nothing to restrain..

a utopian ecstacy begging for more endorphins..

so that i might be able to actually feel

the excitement that my body isn't programmed for..

releasing my serotonin romance into a garden of glee.

and there my unsuitor replies,

"glitter resides in the shimmering tides of our love."

but it's not glitter i seek, it's the pulling...

the yanking...the tugging...the effortless biting..

of her lip...

my thoughts seldom remove me from my person

but here, no, there, i am removed.

without you i am a man, late for his job....

with you i am a westward wind....wistfully wisping away...