her feathers falter

written in '07

infracted interactions; it was in her actions.
displaced with the rations that never met the mouths
minus subtraction, 'cause it's only rhyming with doubt
which is what i've gone without, there's no surplus inside
(it's the way that we hide all our strengths till we die)

or until the rebirth's no longer in sight.

why struggle in sand, if you're not meant for the land?
in a gruesome faerie tale, i read, you fell to the plants.
the uninhabited lands saw the new skin inside you.
in, resides truth. let it's focus design you.
the now defined proof, fell from the forest,
in chorus. we stood there, and let it absorb us.
indeed, it restored us, and let both our feet drop.
sometimes life and time might seem stopped,
when you're being sought, or are seeking after.
her meekness, her laughter..
tell me, what more matters?

the skin, sipped soft, might leave the soul smiling.
thoughts defiling, wondering why it's such a dire thing.

i'm fumbling through interactions, to see infracted reactions.
displaced with the mouths that no longer share their rations.

is it rational, or even right to say...
a faerie's feathers fault her only when her heart's away.

True Love, a true tale(honest!)

written at the end of '03. i'm very aware that this is of epic tragedy, and is almost humorously, emotionally, blunt, but there are still some parts i rather enjoy. maybe it will make you smile/cry. 

p.s. i don't know this sort of loneliness any more, and don't match up to this as much at all. I wanted to share it before it was completely irrelevant though.

so, she rolled over....facing me like that's how the game was played.
i scoffed, fearless of her reaction,
furthermore putting all effort into conveying my obvious dissatisfaction.

her fingers left the palm of my hand,
and were raised to my lips, as if to hush.
she whispered, "no shame",
but the adrenaline rush had already passed.

i had already turned my back, as she pulled at the comforter...
...wanting me to comfort her.

i was still wearing my socks, a sure sign, i had thought,
that this didn't mean what she was pretending it meant.
flashing back 10 minutes in the past, i saw my hand around her throat,
clearly strangling the demon.
i brought my lips to hers to share a vain kiss,
suffocating my desire.

she intended it to be more than just clothes on the floor,
but on nights like these,
the only thing shared is a bottle of vodka.
well, that and the drunken promises we mumble sloppily between heavy breaths,
when breathings' reached it's most difficult tier.
that mixed with the drool and the animalistic panting,
tipping the scale of our love lost finding.

we're "Once Upon a Timing," i should have shot that star down.
instead, i'm under covers,
attempting to smother my overhauled sex drive.
crying 'cause i feel desire's breeze....a second wind.

i'm coming, a long time coming, i finally came,
and i hallowed out her eyes to make windows for her brain.

just to see what's falling out of place...
to see me slip away from God's good grace.
(veterans get praised for whatever work they've done.
with that being said, i can't be expected to feel ill, at all.)

a finger through my hair made the hairs on my back rise...
the angst my heart was feeling lied directly between our eyes.
i let my gaze drift, it comes and goes with the wind, and,
without thinking, i chuckled in her face.

she must have thought that two people meeting in a bar,
and falling in love, was close to impossible,
and that my laughter was sprung from the irony of it all,
cause she smiled rather sweetly.

i hadn't the heart to break it to her....
so, i laid still.......broken

another lonely night to prolong an even lonlier future.
i licked her neck, licked the wound i had left,
and left her there to drown in the empty ocean she swore was our love.